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  • Somehow managed to get in 4 movies last night:

    AMITYVILLE HORROR - I'm sure my expectations were too high, but what a colossal disappointment. I generally love haunted house type movies, but this was just dreary and dishwater dull. Honestly the most interesting thing about this was seeing how bits and pieces of it got recycled in much better movies like The Shining and Poltergeist.

    THE NEST - Just ridiculous fun. I'm not sure what I thought a human-cockroach hybrid would look like, but it definitely wasn't that! If Scream Factory keeps putting out gems like this alongside the more famous stuff like the Halloween and Phantasm sequels -- they could end one of the best labels for horror.

    OASIS OF THE ZOMBIES - So this was the inverse experience of AMITYVILLE. Went in expecting absolute dreck and was pleasantly surprised. SOOO much better than some of the 80's genre films I've seen from Franco. Sure it was padded, and the it looked like he had the effects budget of your elementary school's haunted house...but within that framework the movie actually kinda worked for me. Some of the really bad make-up effects nevertheless ended up being disquieting in the same way that some of the cheap-ass Star Trek/Twilight Zone monster effects could, and the climax was effectively shot and staged so that it ended up having a creepy ambience if you looked past the limitations. Certainly not one of my favorite Francos, but better than I had any reason to expect.

    SCHOOLGIRL REPORT #6 - Was in the mood for German softcore silliness, and this one delivered. Has what I think is the most genuinely (intentionally) funny segment I've seen in the series so far, in which an Italian window-washer sneaks into a college classroom and has his way with half a dozen of the students right under the eye of the near-blind feminist teacher. The runtime was padded with flashbacks to previous entries...but if you're gonna pad your minutes, doing so with bonus Christina Lindberg nudity is officially doing it right.

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    • DOING TIME - Dir. Yoichi Sai (2002)

      Based on the manga by Kazuichi Hanawa, it follows Hanawa as he is imprisoned for illegal gun possession & the monotonous daily rituals of prison life he endures while serving out his sentence. Don't expect Oz type shenanigans as Japanese prisons are a microcosm of their society & are based on orderliness and strict adherence to discipline. No need to worry about dropping the soap in the shower....errr, since there is no shower as prisoners cleanse themselves in a communal bath reminiscent of an onsen. Much of the movie is taken up by series of vignettes of the author shaving, pondering what the prison cafeteria will serve up for the next meal, sweeping his cell, doing menial labor, etc. I have the manga & it pretty much faithfully sticks to it which makes this film a mixed bag. You'll either be fascinated by the quotidian routine of prison life in Japan or bored to tears.

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      • The Exterminator 2 - Not as good as the first one in terms of tension but a fun over the top sequel. I like that Robert Ginty and his chick and his smiley black dude friend drink Miller High Life as they drive around in a garbage truck. I also like that it ends more or less like an episode of the A-Team.

        Eye Of The Tiger - Gary Busey gets out of jail and fights weird bikers, even decapitates a few of them. He also enjoys some Coors and argues with a sheriff. Good times.
        Rock! Shock! Pop!

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        • Originally posted by Ian Jane View Post
          The Exterminator 2 - Not as good as the first one in terms of tension but a fun over the top sequel. I like that Robert Ginty and his chick and his smiley black dude friend drink Miller High Life as they drive around in a garbage truck. I also like that it ends more or less like an episode of the A-Team.
          Did you get the German release?

          Myself I am gearing up to watch No Retreat, No Surrender. ON BLU RAY!!!!!!
          "No presh from the Dresh!"

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          • Nope, Shout! Factory put it out in a four pack with three other trashy action movies.
            Rock! Shock! Pop!

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            • Originally posted by Ian Jane View Post
              Eye Of The Tiger - Gary Busey gets out of jail and fights weird bikers, even decapitates a few of them. He also enjoys some Coors and argues with a sheriff. Good times.
              How about that TANGO AND CASH'esque ending with the super truck? ;D

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              • "Ah! By god's balls what licentiousness!"

                Marquis de Sade, The 120 Days of Sodom.

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                • THE BRAIN (Ed Hunt, 1988). Sometastic. Total elapsed time until giant brain-sucking brain is onscreen: pretty much zero. Shot in Toronto (well, Mississauga, mainly), the high school interiors are Central Tech (CLASS OF 1984), plus Ontario Science Centre. Gore, boobs (not Cyndy Preston's though), and every cent of the FX budget appears onscreen. The R2 full-frame twofer dvd from ebay included Sydney J. Furie's HOLLOW POINT, but looked pretty good for $2.33 Canadian, shipped. Credits disclaimer: don't fuggen flush sodium down the school toilets, okay?

                  WHALE MUSIC (Richard J. Lewis, 1994). Maury Chaykin plays Brian Wilson as Wilde's Selfish Giant, or maybe the Ghost of Christmas Present, but too sad and fucked up to call "come in and know me better". Cyndy Preston climbs up his beanstalk (that's the only thing she'll jack, though) and puts the muse back in the whale music. I liked this a lot. Rheostatics. Credits disclaimer: real mixing boards don't move all by themselves, okay?

                  I appear to be Canadian.

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                  • The Package-Actioner with Dolph & Steve Austin. A lot of big guys beating the shit out of each other and lotsa gunfire. Being familiar with a "macguffin" really helps too. Rental at best.

                    Just Before Dawn-One of the top tier slasher/inbred weirdo films.
                    "The popcorn you're eating has been pissed in. Film at 11".

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                    • Cyclone - Jeffrey Combs builds a super motorcycle with an amazing new power source but then he gets killed so his lady friend, Heather Thomas, has to keep it from falling into the wrong hands. Lots of stuff blows up at the end.

                      Alienator - An alien escapes from a prison planet run by Jan Michael Vincent and PJ Soles only to wind up in the car of some troublemaking kids who hit him with their car. They take him to the game warden's place unaware that JMV has sent a motherfucking Alienator after them. The Alienator is a giant female bodybuilder (Teagan Clive) with a laser strapped to her arm.

                      1001 Erotic Nights - This one is pretty rad. Leslie is the king shit of the Middle East and Annette Haven is a harem girl who decides to save her own life by becoming an awesome story teller to keep him interested enough in her so that he won't execute her. Lots of sex and some good comedy and a good cast, well made.
                      Rock! Shock! Pop!

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                      • SMILEY - A recent slasher that was surprisingly good. The acting was above average, which always helps. Not a tremendous amount of gore but it's a fun late night watch.

                        INNOCENT BYSTANDERS - Stanley Baker is darn near always worth watching and this is no exception. Some offbeat humor and unexpected levels of brutality enliven this spy film. Donald Pleasence is great as Baker's ice cold boss, ready to toss a loyal employee to the dogs when it suits him. Tip of the cap to Clive for the recommendation on this one - the Olive blu looks spiffy.
                        I don't go to church. Kneeling bags my nylons.

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                        • THE FUGITIVE KIND (1960) directed by Sidney Lumet, screenplay by Tennessee Williams & Meade Roberts- it is amazing to me how much this film informs some of David Lynch's work.
                          paul h.
                          woly boly
                          Last edited by paul h.; 02-26-2013, 04:35 PM.

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                          • SKYFALL.
                            Bought a used copy, mint condition, so that my money wouldn't get back to EON.
                            Superb anti-Bond film. Brilliantly backhanded.
                            The real story-teller here is Roger Deakins. What he does with light.
                            "I've been to college, but I can still speak English when business demands it."
                            - Raymond Chandler, 1939.

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                            • Jedi Junkies - a seventy-two minute low budget documentary about hardcore Star Wars fans, the kind that build life size Millennium Falcon's in their backyards and the kind that make fan films and get into cos play and horde toys. It was marginally interesting but didn't go as in depth as it could have.
                              Rock! Shock! Pop!

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                              • THE FULLER REPORT - This is by far the best Ken Clark eurospy I've seen. Fast, fast, fast paced and great fun with beautiful Swedish locales and gorgeous Beba Loncar in a substantial role. The convoluted story actually comes together in the end and it's capped off with a killer Trovajoli score. This is one to show eurospy doubters. The Dorado Films dvd-r is fullscreen though and has a watermark in the lower right corner (same on both counts for their copy of SPECIAL COP IN ACTION making it unnecessary if you have the fandubbed widescreen version).
                                I don't go to church. Kneeling bags my nylons.

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