Released by: Scorpion Releasing
Released on: 7/24/2012
Director: George Bowers/Al Adamson
Cast: Trish Van Devere, Joseph Cotton, David Gautreaux, Donald Hotton, Donald Petrie/ John Carradine, Gene O'Shane, Barbara Bishop, Alexander D'Arcy, Paula Raymond, Robert Dix
Year: 1980/1969
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The Movies:

A recent addition to Scorpion's series “Katarina's Nightmare Theater” comes in the form of a Crown International Pictures double feature: the 1980 thriller The Hearse and 1969's stink bomb Blood of Dracula's Castle. Only The Hearse has an into and outro from hostess Katarina Leigh Waters, who delivers some film trivia as well as some campy schtick. As per usual, the movie can be viewed with or without her input.

The Hearse (1980) dir. George Bowers

C.I.P. presents the tale of a 30-something city slicker who learns of a house she inherited from her aunt in a small town in upstate somewhere. Immediately upon arrival she gets a funny feeling form the locals, except for one teenaged clown, Luke (Donald Petrie), who has the hots for her. And who can blame him? George C. Scott's widow Trish Van Devere looks pretty fine as Miss Jane Hardy in all her short-shorts glory.

Very quickly things start happening around the house, including her finding her aunt's diary where she wrote about her lover. Soon she starts to have a romance of her own with a strange man (David Gautreaux), while keeping the raging teen hormones of Luke at bay. And on top of those troubles she's got to deal with a douchebag lawyer (Joseph Cotton) who thinks he's entitled to the house and is causing her headaches. And then on top of all THAT, she's getting harassed by a mysterious hearse that keeps staring her down. As the tale unfolds it's made evident that Jane's aunt was no Christian and her body never recovered. There's some evil stuff going down and Jane's life isn't the only one that's in jeopardy.

George Bowers, known for his editing of some pretty big movies, does a good job weaving this story of mystery and the supernatural. He follows a formula that works and really makes the viewer want to see where it's all going. It has great atmosphere, good set-ups for some frights, and some genuinely creepy little moments. Lots of familiar television actors show up in this one which may help to add to the feel that the movie was one-step above being a made-for-tv movie, for better or worse.

Despite that there's little by way of visual delights (blood, boobs, beasts), the movie manages to motor along at a nice pace. The tight little story keeps the movie from straying too far off to the side and drifting into the mundane, and aside from the way it ends manages to keep out of the cheese zone enough so that it doesn't become unintentionally funny.

Blood of Dracula's Castle (1969) dir. Al Adamson

Here's the story in a nutshell. The inheritance of a castle leads Glen and his girl Liz right into the hands of the evil Count Dracula and his bride. John Carradine runs the place as a butler, human cattle rancher, and Mango disciplinarian. Once they find out that they're caught in the web of death, Glen and Liz fight to get free and make corpses of their captors.

Now then, the characters. Glen (Gene O'Shane) and Liz (Barbara Bishop) are as white bread as they come, seeming more early sixties-like than the hippie-drenched late 60s. Count Dracula (Alexander D'Arcy) is like a cross between Robert Goulet and Jack Cassidy and about as menacing as a puppy. His wife (Paula Raymond) is seems modeled after Lovey on Gilligan's Island. John Carradine is a total ham with his overly expressive eyebrows, and Mango, his whipping boy, looks like he sucked on lollipops and then race his face through the dirt. To some that could look scary, one can suppose. Then there's Johnny (Robert Dix) a werewolf by night who's in with the vampires and their sacrifices to the Goddess Luna. The scenes of the werewolf running around are so obviously inserted after the fact that it's classic.

Horrible fist fights, guns that kill without seeming to be fired, vampires who sit idle and wait while their would-be killers tie them up to wait for the sun, blood that looks like paint…all signs that point to sheer amusement. The concept of Dracula as a rich snob is funny enough, but when he's played by Mr. D'Arcy it's just gold. And the fact the he and his snooty old lady are squatting in someone else's castle is pretty darn funny as well. The acting makes the film feel more like a community theater project, which of course only enhances the total cheese that this is. So awful, it's awesome is the category this belongs too. It gets slow at times, as bad movies tend to, but there're so many great moments it's worth sitting through.

Video/Audio/Extras:

The two features are presented here in 1.78:1 anamorphic widescreen, and both look pretty darn nice, with only mild print damage. On Hearse, colors are nice and the detail is there. It a movie that takes place in a lot of low light settings and the black levels look nice. Blood at first looks faded, but either gets better in a hurry or you just get accustomed to it. Overall both are more than satisfying to the eyes. The sound on both is in mono, and the tracks do the job. Nothing fancy, but nothing to complain about either.

Aside from the Nightmare Theater optional intro and outro, The Hearse has a 12-minute audio interview with the movie's writer William Bleich. It's pretty dry, to be honest, but all info is good info and he has lots to say. Also included is a trailer for the feature. For Blood, a 30-minute interview with Bud Cardos, director of Kingdom of the Spiders, who worked as a production manager on for Adamson on this film. He's interesting and animated and Katarina looks really nice in her red shirt. Definitely worth the sit through if you have any interest in B movies.

The Final Word:

Two movies worth watching and looking probably nicer than they ever have on home video, Scorpion has put out a disc that should leave you with absolutely no buyer's remorse.